Yet Another Software Junk | മറ്റൊരു പാഴ്‌ജന്മം

If I were Thomas Alva Edison, you might be still in Darkness.

Do you know why I am sticking on to the present company where I work?

It’s nothing but the ’Exit interview’ phobia. By any Chance, If I failed in the exit interview, I won’t be able to attend the same for the next 6 months ;-) Only God and myself knew how I got into this company. I had appeared for 18 unsuccessful interviews to get a good company to work for. Faced interview board from 12 major IT companies and 6 not-so-major companies. I had tried all the 18 tricks (pathinettadavum) and finally I heard "you got through; we would like you to offer..." Sorry I don't remember what he said after that.

Due to the busy schedule, most likely in the Library (only in administration not as a reader), Cricket, CLC etc, I had never imagined about sitting lonely. Once I had to face a ‘suppli’ (acronym for supplementary exam) in my life for the first time. Surprisingly that was my favorite lab- DS lab- I worked a lot for this. Do you know that I still keep its rough record. I loved that lab and I failed in that lab for getting some garbage values on the output in addition to the actual output. It was a ‘forgivable’ mistake, I would say. But that young lecturer didn’t consider that fact. Still, it didn't push myself into sad or lonely mood. Problems have piled up after the campus placements had begun.

I had nothing to put in the resume; no strong academic background; my marks had always swung between 68 -72%. The only asset was a consistent interest in C. Only plus point was a small C++ game. I couldn't even appear for around first 8 walk-ins since their expectation was very high. More than 75 % or 80%. pusthakapuzhu companikal ; just working in Java, DBMS, main frame etc. My dream was to get into a Unix/C oriented firm. I laughed at those giants. They just didn't deserve a 'brilliant' employee like me. I said in my mind. Ahankaaram; athente koodepirappanu.
But it grew up faster up to 6 feet 5inches while I had joined to GECT, itself. But I was just 5'5". Even though I failed to make the first few interviews, he was taller than me.

At that time prestigious companies arranged interviews at Abad plaza, Cochin. I wished if I could have been there for at least one interview (most of my classmates had appeared for interviews there. At last my turn came up. But I never expected it before. 3 interviews in two days. Entha sambhavichathu; entha nadannathu; oru pidiyumilla (I couldn’t remember what happened and what I did). Now, only thing I remember is that they (Abad) were playing Yaani’s live at acropolis in the background (in the reception, in corridors). I love those songs, especially “rain must fall”.

After my first interview(s) I couldn’t look back; I was sure that I’ll pass the written exam and I’ll reach up to the interview. I was sure that she (Abad Plaza) was waiting for me. Probably my technical talent and/or analytical skills were improved. Or all better guys might have got placed by that time. Anyway I became a regular visitor to Abad. Sometimes, I had to wait for longer time for my turn. Tension, tension, tension…; dhoodh peena mein tension; Sometimes I felt to scream at those ‘junk’ Yaani songs. ”rain must fall” appeared like “fire must fall”.

In a few occasion I was the topper in the test. Imagine how much I would have struggled - NOT to pass those interviews :-( Most of the time I was alone. Most of my friends, classmates were placed at that time. Take my ‘T(ea)’-mates; everyone got placed, except me. Take my cricket team; everyone got placed, except me. Take this; take that; everyone got placed, except me. But I was glad to represent my college all the time in interviews. My mind went blank after each interview; once I had even walked around 2 or 3 KM from Abad plaza to Mathrubhoomi Junction. (it could be even 4 or 5 KMs) . I didn’t know the exact distance.

On the way, I saw St.Antony’s church. Ini ippo ivide namichillennu venda. Many times I had walked in front of the church, never bother to get inside. Once I get inside, it was around 9 or 9.30PM. Nobody where there except a family. Very clam atmosphere. I could feel the gentle breeze on my face and my mind became cool.

What could be wrong?

Yeah, I did a few mistakes in technical side. My communication skills were poor. (junks !! they know only Queen’s and Clinton’s English. Poor guys they don’t know the stylish Thrissur accent; I am not blaming them since it was even not understandable by the people from the other part of Kerala)

And I analyzed more; it was not a problem of Communication skills only; they were ready to adjust. They were happy to see that I was answering most of the brilliant questions. Hence they were ready to forgive my mistakes. I remember one lady interviewer, Pooja, she did her maximum to motivate me, to bring best out me. But I resisted (njan vittukoduthilaa).

Yeah, problem was with my attitude.

My mind was much closed in interviews. Never picked up the clues; always kept boundary to the answers ( I knew what they are going to ask next; so I protested them not to ask further). I had miserably failed to understand their expectations. I failed to keep my head cool; I misunderstood that they were trying to find only my negative sides. Never bothered to give a reasonable explanation. One important thing is that I was not a fighting guy in interviews. I never tried to argue them technically. Somany times I couldn’t get what this junk guys were talking about? (may be they were trying to provoke me).

You need to feel the necessity of a job from your heart. Else whatever you do, it will not reach anywhere. Most of the time I wished like “God don’t give me this job if it doesn’t suit me”. Tell me, how will I get a job? So I changed my mind; “Ammini enkil ammini” (*).

Though my (present) company is a well-known IT giant in India, I didn’t know much about their work. I was not aware that this company’s client is a giant in internet and I didn’t know that they have a huge OS (5lakhs line of C code; spread across 30000 C files). And I was completely unaware that my job will be sustaining this code as a part of a prestigious team in the company.

One and only once I prayed like
“Oh GOD, rain must fall at this time.”; yes and it was an unexpected heavy rain!!!

side-notes:
(*) "Ammini enkil Ammini" is mallu local phrase : in fact,it is a 'state of mind' ;-)
backgroud:- One guy searches for a Aishwarya Roy kind of girl as Wife and failed. then finally he reached this state that he had to set his mind to marry any girl. Ammini is a local/common mallu name.

Simillar phrse: "inchi enkil inchi"

to be continued...
---------------------------------------------------------
Part I :Touching 5 years after we split
Part II : Once WE lived there
Part III : Changes
Part IV : Hostel Life

14 comments:

Hey,

This one made me really nostalgic..I think this is one article all of us can relate to in one way or the other...
the interviews, the tension, the stupid answers we gave sometimes..:) and ofcourse the joy when u finally get in ..

Nice one Joju, finish the next part soon..

-Sush

Probably one of your best posts.

Raghu

enikkangu ishtapattu ee blog....njaanun ithaea avasthayil ayirunnae korae kalam munbu..pinnae enganayoo ividea kiari pidichu....jeevitathinte oro kalikalae :-)))))

why do i feel i can relate to this so well !!!! ;)

btw, how is ammini doing? ;)

Man .. this is touching it .. The Heart

In a few occasion I was the topper in the test. Imagine how much I would have struggled - NOT to pass those interviews :-( Most of the time I was alone. Most of my friends, classmates were placed at that time. Take my ‘T(ea)’-mates; everyone got placed, except me. Take my cricket team; everyone got placed, except me. Take this; take that; everyone got placed, except me. But I was glad to represent my college all the time in interviews.

Do you remember the days we walked in the CREC basketball court talking about our 'future' plans? Some time life just pulls our road to bend and have a U turn, take anotehr hairpin.. and then at the end it becomes straight too...
Ellathinum Athintethaaya Samayamundedaa Daasaa.. :-)

Beautifully Put In .. As Raghu (First Sem il ente Benchilirunnu Pascal Polum Ariyaatha Enne C yil code chyethu Njettichha ente sahapaadi Raghu Thannayalle Ithu) said, one of your best post

@Sush: one or two stupid answers are ok. but imagine 18 stupid answer for minimum.

@Raghu: Mr.KB, welcome to my blog!!!

@Praveen: Athanu... that is!
and we are in the same team ...cool isn't it.

@Dew Drops: :-)
Ammini is excellent more than I thought !!!!

@Dhanush:
Enthe ee bhudhi nammuku munbe thonnajathu ??
ennu njan ara manikoor munbu chodhichirikkunnu.

Those old days !! sometimes make me smile :-)

Nice post!

You will make me cry "sir". I am not expecting a heavy rain but but.... a "Chaattal mazha". At least that would help me to keep cool. Most of them got placed from my batch and am still in search of JJOOBB. Each time after an interview my mom used to call me asking "Enthaayi". My silence was enough for her to visualize the moments that had happened in the interview room. And then again i use to tell my mom "Mera number kab aayega?". And then i hear a voice "Neeyum oru naal chakka idum". Annu mazhayude kanhi maasam aayirikkum...

Dear Sir: You are my all time supporter and closely monitored my tough times. and your instructions helped me a lot not to repeat my mistakes.

Dear Student: Believe me. This is the best time in your life. Enjoy it. That will make your head cool. there is no thrill if you get placed in the first interview. Your job search will make you strong in technical skills and you can form a right attitude.
A few people believe in 'time'. good. but don't believe in luck. don't ever think that it is not your mistake. Do analysis on your answers each time. Correct it.
All the Best!

I will always keep your words in my mind(unconcious mind : Bcoz i had heared that the things stored in unconcious mind will be permenant). And sure i will analyze my interview eventhough it failed or not...
And i hope still i would get valuable suggestions...

Hi, my first visit to your blog..read Dhanush's post on ABAD too...
You've put a topic so close to the heart, so nicely..the job search, which is so emotional n sometimes depressing for each of us...with the humurous bits sandwitched in it...really nice n well written !!!

enjoyed reading - "Pooja, she did her maximum to motivate me, to bring best out me. But I resisted (njan vittukoduthilaa)"
“Ammini enkil ammini”
"Most of my friends, classmates were placed at that time. Take my ‘T(ea)’-mates; everyone got placed, except me"

Very well written...

There are times and there are times...
--same old anon

Hey YASJ,

The black shirt which u wore friday rocks, man.......
Other day, I was looking at u from a far corner in the cafeteria.

Still u couldn't find me.
Mosham, Mosham, Mosham

A fan from venus

@Seema : Thanks for your visit and of course thanks for your comments.

@Same old machu: :-)

@fan from Venus: enne agattu kollu :-)

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